Thursday, March 5, 2009

Don't Kiss the Nanny!

I bet you dollars to donuts that no one even reads this blog anymore. I'm not entirely sure why I still have it since I don't write up here. Ever. I suck.

I honestly feel like all of the interesting stuff I have left to say is communicated through comments to other folks. I've noticed a disturbing trend -- the less I blog, the longer my comments are for other people. I left a comment on JJ's blog the other day that was about as long as the last Harry.Potter book. It was truly in the category of Stupid Long.

Many times, I've thought about shutting the blog down entirely. But I still get too many hits on DHEA, miscarriage, IVF, secondary IF, and my pee stick pictures that I guess I'll leave it up. There's really no point in making some giant declaration about how I'm Not Going To Post Anymore because, um, hello? That's sort of self-evident.

I've even tried to tell myself that I'm not going to read and comment on other blogs. Hahahahaaaa, I simply can't do that. I opened up my bloglines in the hopes of trimming some of the 70+ links out so that I can get down to the basics. Guess how many blogs I dropped? Three. And only because they have closed down shop. I am entirely too invested in your struggles, joys, tragedies and triumphs to stop reading now. Especially because so many people supported me through my years of Hell, I don't feel that I've given back what I got yet.

Speaking of closing down shop, I was just about to delete the feed for Mary Ellen and Steve's blog when -- SHAZAM! She posted. And she's pregnant. WAHOO! So I'm glad I didn't do my Winter pruning before I got that update.

Anyway, I'll follow the current trend of ticking off a few bullets about what's new:

- Back in mid-February I started answering the interview questions that E sent to me. It rapidly degenerated into some insanely long post wherein I blathered on and on about completely random shit that wasn't even remotely connected to the topic. Therefore, until it gets edited a bit, I'll hold off on publishing it.

- I'd like to send up a giant FUCK YOU to the IF universe for (what seems like) a BFN for my friend Rho's 6th IVF (this time with DS). I mean, seriously? Why does this have to be so shitty?

- Daylight Savings Time is stupid. I can't believe that I'm going to lose another hour's sleep.

- Remember NannyGate 08? Well, the woman that we hired turned out to be a mean, conniving, rude old bat. She screwed us over, essentially milked us out of a couple hundred dollars, and left us stranded. The icing on the cake is that she never said goodbye to Megan, so my daughter is pretty confused and still seems to think the old bitch is coming back. It's VERY hard to be even remotely pleasant when discussing the witch, but I'm trying to be a good person and not let Megan see any of that. Meanwhile, I wrote the lying hag such a nasty letter that it made my eyes burn to read it. I felt great after that. Of course I realized that it wouldn't be in anyone's best interest to actually send said letter, so I edited it a bit and will be sending that version out sometime this week. Don't you worry your pretty little heads, though, it's still plenty scathing.

- We hired a new nanny and she ROCKS. I heart her so much I practically want to kiss her square on the mouth when she shows up each day. Although that would most likely have essentially the opposite effect of what I'm trying to accomplish (gratitude vs. creepiness).

- I got to see LJs gorgeous, amazing little boy. It was absolutely blissful -- snuggling that warm, wonderful, delightful smelling little guy was just heaven. I'm so happy for her I could burst. She's got about half a dozen blogs at this point, and despite the fact that I read them all, I have no idea if/where I should link for her.

- Work is kicking my ass. Because of all the nanny drama, and all of the extra duties related to this new role I took on, I feel like I'm on a treadmill and can't ever get caught up. That doesn't seem to be stopping me from typing this nice, meaty post (meaty in terms of word volume, not substance).

- Thank you to everyone who participated in the group gift for JJ. We got her lots of good stuff and it's been wonderful to finally get some information about little Oliver. Now if I could only get my ass in gear and finish the baby gift I started almost 2 months ago!! Good grief, at this rate the kid is going to be in college before I send it. Although it's lovely, it's not exactly college dorm room decor so I need to hop to it. (Like that Easter Bunny reference? I'm soooooo witty.)

- I have to imagine that you've all heard by now that Bean is on hospital bedrest. Things seem to be going well, but hop on over and entertain/distract her if you have some time.

- American Idol. If you haven't seen last night's show, don't read this. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK were they thinking bringing that stupid, obnoxious, batshit crazy asshole Tatiana back for the wildcard show? Honest to Pete, that was outrageously dumb. If she happens to make it into the top 12 [shudder], I will refuse to watch one single second of the show again until she is voted off. Viciously.

- Liam and Megan have been sick. Megan has had two ear infections for over 3 weeks now. We are on our 2nd round of antibiotics and I think it is finally starting to improve a little. Liam has had such a terrible cold that he needed to use the nebulizer in the doctor's office earlier this week. I've never seen such a sad, heart-wrenching sight with one of my kids. I know it's small potatoes compared to what many of you have been through (babies with serious medical problems, children who have had surgery, any NICU stay at all, etc.), but seeing his beautiful little face all scrunched up under that sterile, ugly mask just broke my heart. Not that I haven't already been sympathetic, but it gave me an even deeper appreciation for the stress and hurt that Shelby has been going through to get Seth's breathing issues addressed.

- I love craigslist. I have bought and sold a bunch of shit up here in the past 6 months. It's just truly magical to me. I'm about to list an assload of stuff to see if I can get rid of it before selling it at the consignment sale I do twice a year. I hope to made wads and wads of cash. Wahoo!

- I am a fat ass. I started a Biggest.Loser competition here at work. Astoundingly, 18 people signed up. It's been fun so far. I simultaneously started the Carbohydrate.Addict's Diet and have managed to shed about 4 pounds in the first week. Wish me luck!

- I'm excited about weaning Liam. I let my production falter quite a bit (sick and tired of pumping), and worked through almost all of my frozen stash. At Liam's 9 month appointment, I explained that we were going to start supplementing and asked what formula she recommended. I was shocked when she told me to go ahead and start him on cow's milk. So we did, and he loves it. Luckily, he still likes breastmilk too. Now the poor guy goes back and forth between nursing, bottles of breastmilk, and bottles of cow's milk. But he never skips a beat, we are lucky.

- In other holy-shit-my-baby-is-growing-up news, Liam is crawling (although mostly on his stomach), cruising, eating almost exclusively table food, saying "da da" (no "ma ma" yet), and has 6 teeth. He never, ever, ever, under any circumstances wants to SIT DOWN (unless you've accidentally left a TV or cable remote control, a microscopic Polly Pocket shoe, or some other blatent safety/choking hazard on the floor), and demands to walk holding on to your hands all around the house. Around and around and around and around. It's back-breaking but still fun. He's still sleeping fairly shitty and has decided that 30 minute naps during the day are super cool. But he's a great kid and was worth every dollar and minute of agony to have him.

Yup, I think that's it. I'm sure there's more useless stuff I could prattle on about, but surely your patience is waning. And, just in case you weren't listening the first time, FUCK YOU IF universe. You can suck it.


Somewhat Ordinary said...

Yay, a post!! I'm still reading, so do I get donuts or dollars? I was actually wondering yesterday as I moved my list from bloglines to google reader if you were going to post anytime soon.

Love the bulleted update. Thanks for heading up the JJ gift. Sorry the first nanny sucked, but glad you've got a good one now. Hope the kids start to stay well. I'm going to google this carb addicts diet because I need to do something. Can't wait until you post again - just don't let it be too far from now!

Delenn said...

Love seeing a post from you, Leah! Even if its only once in a blue moon—keep posting here! We do read you, really we do!

I also thank you for putting together the gifts for JJ. Very sweet of you.

I am sorry your kids are sick, hoping they are getting better.

You did hit upon one of my issues lately—how do you keep your older kids toys away from the younger one?!? So far we have moved Michael’s toys up to his room. BUT, frequently he brings toys downstairs and then, little Mobile Mabel (Willow) will find them and start putting them into her mouth.

Jendeis said...

Wanted to write a big ol comment about how happy I am that you posted and that I heart you a million times over. Can't get the words together, though, cause I'm too darn exhausted. Hoping to see you soon.

LJ said...

Wait - does this mean I get dollars or donuts? I'll take donuts if it's all same-same...

Even if it's a rare update, I'm always glad to hear what's up with you.

Give those little ones a kiss for me.

Meghan said...

Still here, still reading. I'd like my donut now ;)

Always good to hear from you, I think it'd be completely appropriate to kiss your nanny, I'm on a massive childcare quest and I'd kiss just about anyone to make it happen. Hmmm....that makes me sound a little whore-ish but oh well

Fertilized said...

i was thinking about you the other day. I am glad you posted I was worried and was trying to find your email to checkin on you. Sounds like you are busy ..Um that's an understatement to how busy you sound. You sound exhausted! Good luck on the diet.

Hoping the kids get well soon.

Artblog said...

Hey, dont you dare prune me! I love your blog and I'm sure I comment enough to know I'm interested :)

All my friends have had nanny problems this year, must be something in the water!

Sorry the kids are sick, mine are too and me for that matter but thats to be expected, it sucks huh!

take care you, k?


Kami said...

I'm still reading!

LB just started crawling too. She has said mama twice while crawling to me but has used it other times as well so not officially saying mama or dada. She does waive good bye pretty regularly though.

Sorry about the old nanny - awful!

I sometimes think I should walk away too and maybe try to forget all about IF, but I don't think I can.

Just post every once in awhile!

Anonymous said...

Hello! I am here. . .

Sunny said...

I have missed you!I am glad you are still alive. :)

Geohde said...

You've provided so many thinkgs I could write sensibly about and all I can say is how I want to do painful things to Tatiana because then she'd have something to carry on about that warranted it.



Lollipop Goldstein said...

We're still here--though sometimes I get behind with reading too. Sending a lot of good thoughts for the weight loss stuff--it's so hard!

Shelby said...

I'm still here too! It's great to hear from you- it's been too long! SO glad you found a new rockin' nanny! And I'm sorry your little guy needed a nebulizer treatment. Poor kiddo! The first one is always the hardest. It does get easier (after, say, the hundredth or so time). But it still sucks. Heartbreaking when the kid crawls over to it when he really needs it and waves it at you like "HELLO!! it's time again!!! Get it together lady!!".

Have to get togehter soon- it's been far too long. FUCK the IF gods on Rho's BFN. NO FAIR!!

Miss you! and look forward to the next update, even if it's 6 months away.

Mrs M@sk said...

Will miss you xoxo